21.10.2019More adventures in email:
Brand-new heights of hilarity are reached when someone makes the effort to come to my website—twice!—and ask me why I haven’t killed myself yet.
Seems the question is misdirected.
By way of response, I stick around largely to torment thoughtless little cunts who send unintelligent messages. 😜
… my fifth guest author, Jane Mayberry!
Jane has been kind enough to ask me to share her latest, continuing works. I hope you will find her tales enjoyable and offer her, and the rest of my guest authors, the same excellent feedback for which you all have become known!
02.08.2019The email adventure continues:
Received this little gem:
“Just a brief note: even though I’m the nicest and most respectful guy toward anyone, especially little girls, in my fantasy world I need the most abusive stories possible to get off. Not because I want to but because I need to. Perhaps my anything-but-nice-and-gentle childhood brought me to that point.
I would argue only that I’ve not been judgmental, that I know of; just because I choose to avoid certain works doesn’t mean I’m judging them. The fact that I link to some of these authors in the first place should be proof of that. I would think. 🤔😜
To my readers:
Over the years, you all have been very kind and constructive in terms of where you found me errant: spelling, grammar, tone, etc. Please extend that same kindness to my fellow authors, here and elsewhere. We appreciate it.
17.07.2019To the ‘moderators’ of Kristen's Board:
Nice job shooting yourselves in the cunt. The board's namesake would be spinning in her grave, were she dead.
… my fourth guest author, FractalElf!
Like the others before her, I’ve been very much impressed by her ability to spin an enjoyable yarn. I hope you enjoy my guests’ works as much as I.
05.07.2019Please welcome my special guest authors:
Three wonderful authors—so far—have chosen to join me on my continuing quest to offer readers the best in erotica. Please welcome BigPapaUsagi, CrexCrex and Mek to the fold.
Do you feel you have what it takes to be a guest author at ACErotica? Feel free to send me an email explaining why your work would be a good fit.
03.07.2019To the fellow author who makes me cry:
I’ve checked with the usual suspects. One claims Rey is no longer running ASSTR and the new showrunner has been rebuilding the site, hence all the test uploads. Another says there’s no evidence to back up that assertion. Rey himself has not posted anywhere for a year, that I can find.
At this point, I’m out of things to tell you.
To further ensure that people who should not be reading my shit are in fact not reading my shit, I have added an RTA (Restricted to Adults) tag to each of my pages. This way, anyone employing Net Nanny or similar software will never see my site.
27.05.2019Just because you’re paranoid …
I've received a most interesting email from a reader assuming the worst about a ‘missing’ author and his ‘missing’ collection, and who wonders when ‘they’ are coming for me.
I certainly appreciate the concern, but there are numerous fallacies upon which this assessment is based. Firstly, ‘they’ don’t come for authors.
Secondly, on those rare occasions when ‘they’ do, it is only those who make idiotic errors; such as, writing extreme porn (as opposed to erotica), downloading and/or collecting files that are certainly illegal (don’t break the fucking law, people!), and using your real name.
Thirdly, ASSTR is not in the habit of deleting authors’ sites, even in such cases, or the aforementioned Frank McCoy would not still be there. In addition, there are at least two authors whose sites are corrupted, and I’ve been in email contact with one of them, who is certainly therefore not ‘missing’.
Finally, I write erotica with a quite intentional eye toward its ‘literary value’, a nonsensical phrase nevertheless used by the judiciary to determine the ‘obscene’—which is, frankly, more nonsense. I began this endeavour 20 years ago; to worry over whether someone is ‘coming for me’ is a waste of energy.
As for you, the readers: assuming you are in compliance with the laws of your jurisdiction, ‘they’ are not coming for you, either.
18.05.2019Web site update:
I’ve finally bitten the bullet and started my own site. ASSTR has been a wonderful home, but it’s dying, as evidenced by the off-and-on failure of File Transfer Protocol, our only remaining access as authors.
Read my good-bye here.
In the meantime, as a fellow author—who knows who he is because he still has no fucking email 🤦🏻♂️🤪—has just reminded me, I am in the process of going through my pages making sure everything works properly, so you may find some broken links until then. Rest assured, I’ll get around to it. 😏
Mating Dance Scene 10 is posted. Enjoy!
Rearranging my furniture:
I’ve done a bit of clean-up to the site, moving some of my shorter works (1,500 words or less) to a new page called Admiral’s Bits, including a new brief scene titled Granger Danger. Engorgio guaranteed!
23.03.2019Using FTP, part two:
Art Martin has posted a tutorial of his own, like Chase Shivers before him; Martin also recommends FileZilla.
Art has added a section on getting rid of the ‘black diamonds’ that show up if your ‘www’ directory is corrupt. I tried, just for fun, to create a new directory in which to do a fresh upload of all files but, as expected, that doesn’t work.
Did your entire site disappear?
The above may also be helpful if you are one of those authors whose entire site is gone or loads as ’403 Forbidden’. As long as you can still log in, you may have access to some options.
If it works, let me know, and I’ll give you a shout-out here.
09.03.2019To the fellow author who makes me cry:
… because I could easily explain your concern if I had a way to contact you …
GET A FUCKING EMAIL! 🤦🏻♂️🤪
Seriously. I’ve had Protonmail long enough now that I can recommend it. Just do it!
Mating Dance: this collaboration combining my words with the 3D talents of lcKilli was born of a happy coincidence: each of us has a character named Felicity. Same girl a few years later? I’ll leave that up to you. Enjoy!
27.01.2019Been a while …
... but I’m still around.
The story I’ve had on hold for several months is … still on hold. I can’t say at this point when I’ll get back on it.
That said, I was sort of lassoed into a collaborative project with a 3D loli artist which has turned out to be quite a stunning bit of work. Those of you who have full membership at Lolicit may already be aware of this. For those of you who are not, I’m still working on the logistics of posting it here.
Stay tuned …
07.11.2018Our life blood:
Content creators, like most people, crave validation. Your feedback is an integral part of what keeps us going—writing, creating, perfecting, presenting.
Good, bad or indifferent; a single word or a novella; I will never reject your feedback. ‘Too short’ doesn’t exist. ‘Too long’ doesn’t exist. ‘Too critical’ doesn’t exist. ‘Too effusive’ doesn’t exist.
I’ll take it all, with appreciation— even if I roast you for it. Just a little. 😈
15.10.2018Since you asked …
I’ve had my Hotmail (legacy) account for decades now, and would only recommend its use for correspondence if you exercise extreme care. For that, I use ProtonMail, which I’ve had for a few months.
Do I trust ProtonMail? It’s probably too soon to ‘trust’, for me. That said, I took the plunge, given that the company and its servers are in Switzerland and its management claims to have zero access to our data.
This also means zero data recovery if you ever forget your password.
05.10.2018Adventures in (lack of) email:
Authors of many of the stories available at ASSTR are understandably nervous about sending and receiving emails. The obvious problem, of course, is shutting ourselves off from our readers or fellow authors—and this is especially true when the website is inaccessible for any reason.
I can only offer my own example. I maintain my legacy account, where I receive feedback via Formspree (which I employed after ASSTR’s own formmail system went down). Defeating locators is easy enough, but a bit of a pain, so I use a separate account for correspondence.
This way, I choose how to interact, and any private information stays that way.
Any author who wants to copy my html to set up their own formmail is welcome; remember to use your own email address and Author ID.
As of 01 October, the main areas of ASSTR are back. The authors’ login is still down, but we remain able to upload via FTP.
We can only hope at this point that the restoration is something resembling permanent.
The main areas of ASSTR are still loading as blank pages. Site administration has been completely silent, near as I can find. Authors’ individual sites are working, and I am seeing their updates when they happen.
I’m about half done with my newest story, tentatively entitled Empathy. Since real life also has me busy, I’m afraid I cannot offer anything more specific just yet.
27.07.2018Q & A:
(General comments): “Why ‘Admiral Cartwright’?”
Ooh—good question! I’ve included the answer in my biography of sorts, here.
21.07.2018Not ‘down’, exactly:
Several pages in the main area of ASSTR (e.g., Main Page, Authors, Site Map) are functional in terms of connection, but are loading as blank pages. I see no indication as of 23:20 UTC that this is being addressed.
Meantime, I’ve checked numerous authors’ individual sites, and all are working properly.
Several of my fellow authors have emailed me, asking how I’m uploading files while web-based uploads are nonfunctional. Since using an FTP client may be new to some of you, Chase Shivers has been kind enough to include a tutorial. Like Chase, I use FileZilla; other FTP clients will have a similar interface.
To state the obvious, I also use a VPN.
Felicity: this short piece flowed from an idea that didn’t fit the context of a much longer story that’s still in progress. Enjoy!
05.07.2018To Rey, et al.:
My thanks for your continued hard work to keep ASSTR up and running for authors and readers alike. We appreciate it more than you may ever know.
Adventures in email, part two:
Re Nine for Eleven (reproduced verbatim):
“Lovely story, I like my mother was a full fledge women at eleven, 36FFF, and still growing and topped out at 44HHHHH. Mother had had me when she was fourteen and was worried that I would wind up like her and put on the pill. She taught me that men loved girls that gave good blow-jobs and loved being fucked in the ass so she started with her dildos opening my ass so as not to hurt and learning how to deep throat any size cock. As time went on I got to train on the men she brought to fuck her. I had a hard time finding a white man to make me happy so mother put an ad in an underground paper and we found a black man with many friends. I have given birth to his son and eleven daughters to each of his friends. Mother also has enjoyed his friends and when I married him at nineteen she went off her pills like I did. We had several daughter together.”
Well. That was … fascinating. 🤔😜
Real life has my full attention for the moment. I have written about one quarter of one story, and the intro to another; both are going to be sitting idle for a while. I’ll keep y’all posted.
14.03.2018Adventures in email:
Recent feedback: “Stop reposting your fucking stories over and over and over, you asshole.”
Okay, you self-important cunt—I’ll just repost my fucking stories over and over. 😜
Most of us use a good VPN.
And, for the record, I did not request a demotion … 🤪
I currently have two stories in the works, though neither is anywhere near ready for public consumption. (I’ll let y’all know.) One of them is quite dark, for me.
One author who was kind enough to link to my recommendations page wrote, “I’m a little afraid you’ll never come back to my site, but whatever pleases my readers is for the best.”
That’s what target="_blank" in your <a> is for.
May you forever have blank in your a. 😏
18.02.2018‘Can’t thank you enough’, part three:
Authors write for many reasons: to create something that wasn’t there before. To see an idea become a thing. To scratch a reader’s itch. To scratch our own itch. To get feedback—which, let’s be honest, is validation that we done good.
As wonderful as your response to my efforts has been, there is perhaps no higher honour than to hear from another author that you helped inspire them to share their efforts, too.
Thank you, Renpet—and keep up the good work.
‘Can’t thank you enough’, part four:
Perusing the recent uploads, I caught this little gem from Georgie Porgie:
“If you like my nice stories, but not the nasty ones, [Admiral Cartwright]’s stories are just what you’re looking for. The only reason I hadn’t added a link to his site sooner is that one does not lightly presume to link to a god.”
Wow—first: holy fuck, thank you! Second: I’m just a lowly admiral, and even that’s fake. Third: I refer you to the very famous “CLAPTON IS GOD” poster. 🤪
Meantime, I just noticed I hadn’t linked to your site; that has been rectified.
Hilo Blow. Enjoy!
12.02.2018‘Can’t thank you enough’, part one:
Many readers have honoured me and my work with their feedback—“the best I’ve ever read”, or “a masterpiece of erotic fiction”, or some such. One went straight to, “You are the greatest writer of our tiny little planet.” Hyperbole, definitely; an honour, absolutely.
This week brought my favorite response, ever, from an anonymous reader who made a “strictly tangential” observation: “that you ‘bothered’ to employ ‘Independence Day’ to name the holiday speaks to your character. You see the storm, and know it is much closer than the horizon.” (Good Things Cum)
I’ve always been detail-oriented, occasionally throwing in little tidbits that (I hope) blend into the narrative while adding that speck of realism, or humanity, or whatever else seems to fit the moment. It’s immensely gratifying to see their effect.
‘Can’t thank you enough’, part two:
To LSR for the shout-out. I’m so eagle-eyed, in fact, that I noticed my name doesn’t link to my page. What the fuck, people … 🤪🤪🤪
The Girl On the Train by Tempest. A most enjoyable quickie.
Movie Night (part 1, “may or may not be end of story”) by Dayvid Notellin. Three words: hot. As. Fuck.
A reader offered a bit of constructive criticism with respect to Double Take: there were some passages in which he had to backtrack a line or three to be certain which character was speaking. I’ve made some fixes to address that.
Q & A:
(General comments): “Have you thought about doing some Asian girl stories? I love those.”
I have indeed. Check out Missy.
(Missy): “Maybe a new series with Missy’s kids?”
The protagonist is ‘fixed’. Of course, that can be fixed …
05.02.2018I’ve noticed that some authors tend to engage better with their readers if they offer something a bit more interactive than merely posting feedback.
So, just for the fun of it, I’m going to try keeping a log on this page to answer your questions and provide any updates.
I recently extended the final passages of Nine for Eleven. I felt as if I had rushed the ending, but a new encounter here was illogical. A new POV, on the other hand, was perfect.
Q & A:
(Missy): “You care for these girls?”
The story is 100% fiction; instead, we would have to assume it to be true for any response to be meaningful. That said, were I the protagonist in a hypothetical such situation then, yes, I would.
(Good Things Cum): “Are you going to keep writing?”
As inspiration strikes.
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